Brad, the unpaid intern cast in Avengers: Doomsday as unpaid intern

HOLLYWOOD – Alpine 6 Action News’ very own Brad, the unpaid intern has been cast to star in the next installment of Marvel’s Avenger’s franchise alongside some of Hollywood’s biggest stars like Robert Downey Jr., Anthony Mackie, Vanessa Kirby, and Pedro Pascal.

While Marvel and its parent company, Disney, have historically kept information about their biggest film and T.V. projects under wrap better than the Pentagon hides its OPSEC, Brad has agreed to break his NDA to announce he’ll be taking on the role of Unpaid Intern #1, a character whose work ethic and willingness to work for free, will be vital to the Avenger’s success against the titular villain, Dr. Doom.

“It’s pretty exciting, I guess,” said Brad. “I once starred in Fiddler on the Roof in high school—well, I say starred; in reality I was just a techie who missed a lighting cue and got stuck out on stage with the rest of the cast. Regardless, I’ve known I’m meant for bigger things than simply being an unpaid intern. I truly believe this is a major steppingstone in my journey to fame and prosperity.”

Marvel recently held a five-hour long live event where they announced a large number of cast members who’ll be starring in the 2026 superhero film. Some of the most notable names included Pedro Pascal as Reed Richards, Sir Patrick Stewart as Charles Xavier, James Marsden as Cyclops, Channing Tatum as Gambit, and Florence Pugh as Yelena Belova. Surprisingly missing from the cast announcement was Brad.

“Not seeing my name on one of those director’s chairs definitely stung,” said Brad. “But you know what? It’s Marvel. They do a lot to keep information secret. They don’t want to spoil any big surprises or plot twists. I’m sure that’s what they’re doing here. They don’t want to ruin the surprise that Me and Sydney Sweeney are in the film as Black Cat. Well, she’s Black Cat. I’m her intern. Trust me, I don’t look good in black latex. Nor do I have the assets to play a character like that, if you know what I mean.”

Brad’s fans, namely his mother and that weird guy with a lazy eye in the mailroom, whose name I can never remember, have taken to social media demanding Marvel and Disney include Brad in more of the movie’s marketing campaigns, but Marvel refused.

“Look, we appreciate everything Brad has done for us so far, but it’s not in our best interest to spend our promotional money on an unpaid intern,” said Kevin Feige, head of Marvel Studios. “It just doesn’t make financial sense.”

As someone else who appreciates everything Brad, the unpaid intern does for free at our company, I can absolutely relate to what Feige is saying. I don’t think Brad has seen a single dime since signing on with Alpine 6 Action News and yet he’s undeniably the hardest worker. Why would you pay for something if they’re willing to do it for free?

Anyhow, assuming Brad’s part doesn’t get left on the cutting room floor, you should totally go check out Avengers: Doomsday whenever it actually comes out.